Tuesday 14 June 2011

How it all started (part eight)

 Jesse and I dated for 8 months. I was a walking zombie. I thought he was better then me because he made it seem that way. He would tell me I was nothing without him. I would call him a fuck up and a low life loser. He would call me a cunt and a slut. I would end up calling him ugly. We would fight all the time over stupid things and over absolutely nothing. He would get jealous and I would get jealous. I would go home crying all the time feeling the bruises on my legs arms and face. I have some battle scars that still wont go away. I was in love with a monster. 
 The only reason Jesse and I split was because my aunt was tired of seeing me hurt all the time. She would end up crying with me and trying to keep me away from him. She would give me activities to do like acting lessons at the Seattle Theatre. I remember getting a emotional part for the play. The girl lost her family and I ended up crying on stage when I really got into the character. People applaud at how real it seemed. When really I just thought of Jesse while I was doing the part and cried over him and not the fact that the girl lost her family. My aunt was finally done with me and knew that I would keep sneaking around to see him. So she sent me back home to Vancouver. 
 Once I got to the train station Jesse was there. He told me to live with him to run away with him. I wanted to so badly but then I saw the cut on his lip that I gave him the other day. Did I really want my life to be all fights. Did I want to live my life like this with a boy who can't even support himself. I gave him a kiss good bye and told him I loved him. I got on the train and Jesse started calling me over and over again. I broke my phone so I wouldn't be tempted to answer it. I cried the whole way back to Vancouver. 
 My dad was waiting at the train station. I was wearing a tank top because it was summer time at this point. I was only in Seattle for a year.  I was now 17 and had already been in an abusive relationship. I had some cuts and bruises on my arms and chest. My dad had no idea about Jesse so I never told him. I just told him I was in a wrestling class to get some anger out. I told my dad about my broken phone. He said it was okay because I wouldn't be able to use that phone anyway since it was an american line. 
 I got home and saw my old bed. I actually missed it. I took a deep breather and finally felt good about everything. I felt free and more me then I ever did that year with Jesse. 
 After a couple weeks of being home I couldn't stop thinking about Jesse I was haunted by him in my dreams and while I was awake. Every time I would turn the corner I thought that I would see him or hear his screaming voice. I was a scared puppy dog. 
 I ended up getting a summer job so I could keep my mind off Jesse. I ended up working at a Clothing store south of Park Royal. My boss was nice and the job was actually kind of slack. There was only 5 of us working in the store. It was small so there was no need for more people. 
 One day I walked out of the store to go to the cafeteria for my lunch break. On the way to the cafeteria I herd someone calling my name. "Dylan!!! Over here!!" I turned my head and looked around I then saw a brunette girl waving her hand at me I squinted and It was Sasha. Sasha and I used to be really close. We met each other through my brother. He was dating one of her friends and Sasha and I ended up being really close with each other. I haven't seen her for almost 2 or 3 years. I walked towards her stand and saw that she was selling jewellery. 
 Sasha looked at my name tag and said. "So you work here now? Where? How have you been? I haven't seen you in ages!" Sasha kinda talks really fast and says a lot at once. It reminded me of our old times. I answered her questions and told her that I was living in Seattle for a while. We ended up catching up for the whole lunch break that I had and exchanged numbers. I was in need of a friend. I didn't really have any. 
 Once I got home I got a phone call on my cell phone. I answered and it was Melanie. She was an old friend of mine too. We used to party a lot together. She said she herd that I was back and was wondering if I wanted to go to a party with her. I told her I would love to because I really needed to get my mind off Jesse. 


Part 9 will be up later. 


xox
Dylan

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